Everything You Wanted Is On The Other Side Of Fear

​Fear

This is a term I’ve run from my entire life. So many dreams have slipped through the cracks because I’ve let fear control my life. How many times do we want something but never quite get it? How many times do we allow fear to take control of our decisions? We allow fear to stop us from making something we want real.

As a kid, my dream was to become a singer. I always play music in the car, the shower, when I’m working out, etc. Music plays such an important role in my life. One day, when I was younger, I was in my school gym. I went on the stage and saw a microphone. I started singing song after song, performing for myself but I loved it. When I was in middle school, I sang a song with three other people, in front of my whole school. I was so scared but I did it anyway. My feet were glued to the floor and I never looked up during the performance, but I did it. The same year, I auditioned for a play you were required to sing. The teacher decided he liked how I sounded and wanted to place me in front of the stage, to sing a solo. The next day, I never returned. I let fear stop me, from doing something I really loved and allowed opportunities to be taken away.

How many times do you let fear stop you? We let fear stop us from telling people how we feel or stop us from moving, going after a career we want, fighting for love, etc. I’ve let fear stop me from falling in love and allowing myself to be vulnerable, regardless of what the outcome was. I’ve let fear, control how I handle everything in my life.

Have you ever had a gut feeling about something in life that old you, “No, not this time. You keep them and hold onto it as long as you can. Do not let fear take this from you?” But in the end, fear won, because no matter how much we want something, we are too scared to hold onto it. Why? I used to ask myself this question. What am I so afraid of? Of being happy, of getting the career I want or of falling in love? I don’t know.

Fear is an excuse. Fear gives everyone an out, to avoid their problems. Fear allows people to reach for something half way without commitment. When we don’t get the answer we want, at least we can say we tried. One door closes, another one opens. Sometimes taking the risk, helps us discover a part of who we are. Sometimes we discover a better opportunity once we let go of the one we didn’t get.

I take everything in life as a lesson. The girl you like, doesn’t like you back? You can learn from it. Maybe you learned how to be selfless or how to fight for something. You didn’t get the job you wanted? Maybe the business would have gone bankrupt in a few months or a better paying job arrived, a few weeks later. You decide you don’t want to be friends with someone you’ve known for years? Maybe they end up hurting you if you stayed friends or maybe you learned they played their role they needed to in your life.

Life is made of many lessons, we just need to start paying attention. Don’t regret the chances you take that don’t work out in your favor. There is a reason for each path taken. Just because we want something, doesn’t mean it’s right for us. But if we never take the opportunity to fail, we will never know what could have happened. In the end, we are only hurting ourselves from discovering something great. Stop letting fear control your life and allow yourself to go after what you want. If you fail, learn from it. If you succeed, grow from it. There are so many possibilities in this world, we just have to be willing to take the first leap.